No one posts the bad pictures!!

                           

                              No one posts the bad pictures

                                                                   Jo Mitchinson

I’ve long wanted to write a blog entitled “No one posts the bad pics”. We keep the 8 chin photos, faces that give away exactly how we actually feel about a situation & eye rollingly awful day photos away from social media - despite strangely keeping them stored on phones. We favour the uncharacteristically good ones & even then feel obliged to be self deprecating about them!! 

So here is a selection of some of the worst/most random photos stored on my phone from the last 12 months & the stories behind them!!

First up was January lockdown- online teaching. I did this for a soul destroying 5 months in total, ‘Teams-ing’ lessons into firstly students homes & then into my own classroom, through a seemingly endless speed date of supply teachers who often sat right in front of the camera preventing me from seeing my class at all, but sadly not blocking out the noise of the chaos that was ensuing in my absence. This pic was a screen shot of the moment one teacher said “can you just come & collect them please- they’re causing disruption”. If I was allowed to just nip in to my own classroom & remove a kid who’s taking their chances- I wouldn’t be sat in my lounge, 12 miles away listening to this!! 

April 12th- pubs reopen. Sadly for me it was also the day I had a much need sleep assessment at Royal Brompton (South Kensington- quite busy the night pubs opened again!!). So with wires glued to my head & gadgets monitoring every movement & every breath, the fire alarm that threw us all out onto the packed London street in my pjs was very unwelcome & somewhat ironic at a sleep clinic. 

June 19th- Ellie crashed her bike. This one really did push the limits. This photo was when we were still in Hillingdon, absolutely exhausted. Dave spent the Hillingdon time sleeping in the van in a car park as we were not allowed to visit at the same time. We both stank, we were fueled solely on coffee & there were times when Ellie was really terrifyingly unwell. Watching her have seizures due to her head injury, my usually mild daughter swearing at the Drs using words I didn’t know she even knew, has stayed with me. But then so has the spontaneous cup of tea another mum made me when I was in pieces & the lengths the cycling community went to just to help us get her equipment back from race venue. One of the first on scene even stopped her Garmin- knowing she’d want the 30mph to stationary in an instant data!! She’s still recovering, there is still progress to be made - but she’s riding & racing again!!

Oct 2021- a straightforward appointment to see if I could get some lumps removed from my elbow became a biopsy ‘just in case’. This became a diagnosis of an autoimmune condition, usually linked to diabetes or thyroid problems. Which led to blood tests to see if I really am that much of a medical freak (I am, I have neither) The blood tests led to more tests culminating in a CT scan. I’m a massive fan of the NHS- they’ve clearly helped my family more than most this year….. but the cannula that was put in looked like I’d had a go myself with my left hand after necking a pint of vodka. I sat waiting for my scan in my hospital gown looking like an extra for a new horror film. That picture has intentionally been left out here!!

Feb-Dec 2021- Gilbert. Gilbert the Gland has worked overtime this year. Gilbert used to conform to the rules that the amount he works should be directly proportional to the threat posed. But this year quite frankly he’s been on Speed, overreacting to every little thing & leaving me with an armpit that looks like a hamster trying to hide a melon in its pouch!! Gilbert has been up for weeks on end, effecting how I feel, even what I can physically wear. He took a particular dislike to the flu jab for the first time in his life & his reaction to the Covid vaccine was completely irrational. I think depressingly I have more photos of Gilbert on my phone than any of my friends & family this year- so here's one of his best angle.

In conclusion, I have absolutely no idea why many of the photos on my phone exist - and I definitely need to work on my selfie pouts. I sincerely hope that 2022 is a quieter year that arrives, sits down and shuts up - rather than repeatedly smashing us in the face. This year has felt a lot like trying to push custard uphill at times!!